Dreams, Dreams, Dreams……………………..

We all have them. I am sure they continue to change as we grow up and mature. I often wonder what are my dreams…is it the big spacious house with a garden?, is it career?, is it a slim body or health in general?.   I know that I would like to have it all but one of the most important things in my life is to have a happy and healthy family. Husband checked, children hmmmm…. that seems to be one of the main and the biggest dreams and at the same time the biggest problem in my life. I hope to be able to tell my  story, struggle or journey (however we can call it). During this process (trying to have a child) that has started around 2011, I have experienced many different feelings and emotions from anger, frustration, irritation, jealousy …to feeling tired and exhausted and at times ready to give up. It is like a rollercoaster that goes up and down with different speeds.

I wonder how many women are in a similar situation. How many of us feel that way but don’t talk about it because … we feel …it is embarrassing these days… no one wants to hear us or we can’t trust anyone. At least I found myself not wanting to talk to anyone.  I thought none can understand me unless they go through the same problem. And talking about it over and over was just making this process more stressful.  So maybe this is my way of dealing with it but writing about, and not knowing if anyone will even read this.

Until the next time…

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